"I'm in a bad mood, but I don't know why"
Have you ever been in one of those moods where you don't know what's wrong, but everything and everyone irritates you? Your thoughts don't feel like your own, but you can't seem to think any other way? You want to do something, but can't seem to find the energy to make the first step? You keep thinking, why am I so frustrated when I have things so good? It's like being inside a bubble - we can see the outside world but we feel trapped within our own.
Times like these used to control me for days on end: I figured it was pointless trying to fight a losing battle.
While my moods are still hard to grapple with, the one thing I try to do is just sit with the thoughts and learn; continuously asking myself questions like a probing journalist:
-When did you start feeling this way?
-How did it start?
-Where were you when you first felt it?
-Who was with you?
-What did you feel?
-Why do you think you're feeling this way?
Sometimes the answer is instantaneous, but more often than not it isn't. But by being active, rather than passive, like a salmon swimming against the current rather than being taken with it, allows a person to grow and change into the person they want to be.
"Hardship prepares ordinary people for extraordinary destinies" - C.S. Lewis
Written with love, Dr Kat x